Wednesday, December 12, 2007

Christmas Past, Present & Future

In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God; and the Word was God. This One was with God in the beginning. . .And the Word became flesh and dwelt among us. . . John 1:1, 14a

Monday, December 3, 2007

A Bowl of "Duck Soup", Please

[As new Prime Minister of Freedonia, Rufus T. Firefly, in Duck Soup. In an interchange with stuffy, wealthy widow, Mrs. Teasdale]:
WIDOW: As chairwoman of the reception committee, I welcome you with open arms.
FIREFLY: Is that so? How late do you stay open?
WIDOW: I've sponsored your appointment because I feel you are the most able statesman in all Freedonia.
FIREFLY: Well, that covers a lot of ground. Say, you cover a lot of ground yourself. You'd better beat it. I hear they're going to tear you down and put up an office building where you're standing. You can leave in a taxi. If you can't leave in a taxi, you can leave in a huff. If that's too soon, you can leave in a minute and a huff. You know, you haven't stopped talking since I came here? You must have been vaccinated with a phonograph needle.
[Still as Firefly, in an interchange with snooty Sylvanian Ambassador Trentino]:
FIREFLY (to Mrs. Teasdale after a marriage proposal): All I can offer you is a roofus over your head.
MRS. TEASDALE: Your Excellency, I really don't know what to say.
FIREFLY: I wouldn't know what to say either if I was in your place. (To Trentino, also after her for her money:) Maybe you can suggest something. As a matter of fact, you do suggest something. To me, you suggest a baboon.
TRENTINO: What?
FIREFLY: I'm sorry I said that. It isn't fair to the rest of the baboons.
TRENTINO: I did not come here to be insulted. . .I shan't stay here a minute longer.
FIREFLY: Go, and never darken my towels again!
MRS. TEASDALE: Oh!
TRENTINO: My hat!
FIREFLY: My towels!

Saturday, October 27, 2007

The "Poe" College Student

Once upon a midnight dreary
While I pondered weak and weary
O'er forgotten volumes literary,
Having no time to go and make merry
As the words on the page grew small and bleary
And thoughts of "Dreamland" warm and cheery:
I, finding myself no longer wary
Let out a shriek that was really quite scary:
Quoth my raving, "Nevermore!"
---C. Marie Byars, 1985

Sunday, October 21, 2007

Say, What???

Time flies like an arrow; fruit flies like a banana. ---Groucho Marx

Tuesday, October 2, 2007

Literary Groucho

Outside of a dog, a book is a man's best friend. Inside of a dog, it's too dark to read! ---Groucho Marx

Monday, October 1, 2007

The Moderate Way

"The middle of the road is all of the usable surface. The extremes, right and left, are in the gutters." ---Dwight D. Eisenhower

Wednesday, September 26, 2007

NOT in the Bible!!!

"Heaven helps those that help themselves." ---From "Hercules & the Wagoner", AEsop

Ya Gotta Be Kidding!

"Safety experts" warn us to minimize distractions while driving. Are any of these people parents?!?!?!?!? ---Marie